STARTING OVER

I've always loved to write, always wanted to be a writer, have even had some things published, but when I went back and reread my blog posts, I wondered if I had lost what talent I may have had or never really had it. I even tried to delete one blog post that doesn't really communicate what I want to say. Someday I'll go back and change it.

Life is like that sometimes. We get to a place where we look back and wish we could start over. Or maybe we finally get to the end of a long tunnel and realize that part of our life is over and know we can't go back and we're not sure where to go from here.

That's how I felt when I first started this blog. I had just gone through my sister's 5-year cancer journey with her. I only saw her 4 times during that time but e-mailed her nearly every evening. Suddenly, my evenings were empty. I thought this blog might fill some of that time. It was only recently that I looked back and realized something else had filled it.

For the past 8 months I have been caring for a close friend whose ability to care for herself has been waning. Many people go through this with their parents. My friend is only 6 years older than I am. Only those who have gone through this process can understand the frustration and exhaustion it involves. But it is worth it to help someone you love.

It looks like my friend is now close to being in a place where she will receive round-the-clock care. The evenings I spent making sure she took her medicine and ate supper, writing out the next day's activities, reading, sharing, and praying together, will be empty once more.

But not for long. I'll be starting over. I wonder what my next assignment will be. Maybe writing that book I've wanted to write for a long time?

I AM WHO I AM

I can better understand God's name if I change one word - “I am that I am” to “I am WHO I am.” If I really believe God is Who He is, who He says He is, that He is always acting in a way that is consistent with Who He is, then I will live in the light of that truth and will be who I claim to be (a Christ-follower).

If God is all-wise, then He always acts purposely and never makes a mistake.

If God is all-good, then all He does is good and results in good.

If God is all-powerful, then nothing is too hard for Him.

If God is just, then He will make all things right.

If God is love, then He desires what is best for me.

If God is ever-present, always with me, then I need never fear.

The list could go on, but if we believe it, if it is the foundation of our understanding, then we will not question what God does, but rest in the fact that He is who He is. (The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.)

Many of us had to come to Him by way of being stripped of all earthly wisdom and power, to come to the end of ourselves. (Blessed are those who do not need that extreme discipline in order to believe.)

God's name (“I am that I am”) also speaks of His self-existence. He is. Period. That is not true of us. Our existence depends upon Him. (Read John 1:1-4. ) Denying that fact does not make it any less true. Only as we acknowledge this truth can we truly live. (Read John 1:6-13.) Only as we believe in His name can we live forever (John 3:16-18).

Do you know the God of the Bible? Have you read His Book? The Apostle John says he wrote his account of Jesus' life so that “you might believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God; and that believing, you might have life through his name.” The Gospel of John is a good place to start.

What, Where, Who, and the Will of God

 

God's will is not so much a what or a where (what job or college, where to live, etc.), but a WHO (and I don't mean who am I going to marry). Whatever I'm doing, wherever I am, with WHOM can I share the love of Christ? That shifts my focus from me and my circumstances to those around me and the God who so loves the world that He gave His Son to die for all that we who believe might live – a God who is not willing that any should perish, but that ALL should come to repentance. No exceptions. How shall they hear except we be sent? Here I am, Lord – send me.

The what and where become secondary to the who that He wants to use me to reach. (That is because what's and where's are temporal. Who's are eternal.) His will may be in a place of prosperity or in poverty or even in prison. God puts us wherever to be a Light in the darkness, to bring hope to those who have no hope, or a false hope. That is His purpose – always. 

Who is in your life and what are you doing about it? Are you ready to give an answer to anyone who asks the reason for the hope that is in you.

If you are not ready, or if you do not have a visible hope, He will put you in places to prepare you for sharing His love and hope with others. Perhaps you are in that place of preparation now. Understand that God puts you through the fires of testing to purify you, to take out the dross that is keeping you from fulfilling His purpose, His good will. He wants to give you as well as others a “future and a hope” (Read Jeremiah 29:4-14). If you seek Him with your whole heart, you will find Him.